I leave for Spain in less than a week. My anxiety is manifesting in a variety of ways.
I am having odd dreams. In and of itself, that is no different than any other time when I am not anxious, but these have felt particularly stressful. Last night, I was fighting a large pig (in our pond) to rescue my cat. It was horrible.
I am plagued by the feeling that I have forgotten something really important. I have been ticking things off of my list, but I also keep adding things. Some of these things don’t have to be done before I leave, but adding them to the list helps me feel like I am covering all of my bases.
I am buying too many items. One thing I do when I am stressed about an event is to obsess over my wardrobe for said event. When the event in question is a month-long stay in Europe, that is a lot of obsessing. The result is I keep buying clothes, and this somehow makes me feel I am preparing for the trip.
Another thing I have done, and I suggest this to anyone traveling abroad with anxiety issues, was to exchange my currency ahead of time. I went to my own bank, where my friend Courtney works, and I ordered Euros a week ago. I will arrive in Spain with no need to figure out my cash situation. I am covered.
I have a persistent tightness in my chest. This is the normal anxiety I get before any social or new situation, and studying abroad will be both. This is also how I feel before air travel. I actually love flying, normally, but the older I get the more nervous I become before a flight. This is a long flight across an ocean, so cue the anxiety.
I need to breathe and take things one day at a time. So today is about finishing work projects and refilling all of my medications for the month of July. That is it. I am not expecting anything else of myself.
I have created a category on the blog just for Spain posts, so if you are a new reader and only here for my study abroad posts, you can click on that category to weed out anything else I write about.